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You read that right - playboy bunnies!
When I was attending junior college I worked at McDonalds. First, the
screaming pickle trick. When you fry the hamburgers, you have a flat tool with
a handle that you use to sear the meat. You arrange the round frozen meat patties
on the grill, then using all your weight you bear down on the searing device to
sear the meat. Tremendously important step for creating those delicious, shoe-leather-like patties.
Now take a fat round pickle slice and toss it on the empty grill.
Let it sit for a while. Now get the searing tool in one hand and the spatula in the
other. Scrape off the pickle, then toss it back down on the grill while shifting
your hands so you can bear down on the searing handle with both arms - really
lean on the thing! The top surface and sides of the pickle are sealed.
The pickle "screams" as suddenly vaporizing water from the bottom of the pickle,
now pressed against the hot grill, escapes.
The only other McDonald's trick I knew was called "Break Time Change". They only
gave you ten minutes for a break. You food was half price. People would toss
a dollar or two (hey, it was 1977!) on the stainless steel counter in back near
the grill and run downstairs to eat their food. Being the fry cook, you would
take the change the manager left out for them from the stainless steel counter
and put it on the grill. An accomplice would wait by the back stairs to listen
for your victim to return from break. A quick word from him or her, and using your
spatula you would scoop up the change from the grill and put it back on the stainless
steel counter. No one picks up loose change from the counter, it's too difficult because
it just slides around. No, you sweep it off the counter into your hand. But when
your victim does that, he or she immediately notices that their change is the same
temperature as the grill - they involuntarily fling it across the kitchen. Genius.
My second year of junior college I worked at the Hormel lipid research lab - despite the
name it's part of the University of Minnesota. I cleaned
a lot of fish tanks hung over on Saturday morning while my supervisor Don just laughed
at me. KT was a post doc who worked there. He took me to Chicago to hang out with
his friends. KT only had one name - Thagaragen. He spent many fruitless hours trying
to explain to me why. His friend had a Playboy Club key, so we went to the cabaret there.
Man, Bunnies were hot! I was only twenty, but I quickly observed that you could never
catch a Bunnies' eye. It's hard to imagine a job where men just stare at you. I tried
not to be obvious. There were tables pressed against a railing in the balcony where we
sat. My chair was pushed out from the table a bit, as was the guy's in back of me.
Consequently, to serve drinks to the guys close to the railing, our Bunny waitress had
to turn sideways and slither past us. There was no way I was going to pull my chair
closer to the table - every time she pushed past me she would drag her Bunny tail across
my back shoulder to shoulder! She dragged it across my shoulders every time -
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